Friday, September 9, 2011

Doofusville

Independent Press:
Feb 24, 2011
Forfeited to a pack of dogs.


On Feb18, 2009 the Farm & Ranch Weekly reported that Miles City spends an average of $3500 per year euthanizing cats and dogs.  Additionally, Mayor Whalen directed the police dept and its animal control division to step up enforcement of animal-related violations, so, by implication, Miles City will be spending even more!


On a per capita basis, Forsyth would/should spend $805 per year on animal control related expenses, if operating by the Miles City standard.  As of 3/2010, Forsyth spent a grand total of $552 in 13½ years…… or an average of $49 per year.  So $805 per year, at $25 per dose, equates to (32) dogs per year.  Notice cats were eliminated from this equation, since the animal control supervisor privately claims he was “directed to ignore cats.”  One or two really bad actors may have been euthanized in the last 13½ years, but the truth is that the bulk of the money goes towards R&B for dog motels paid to the Yellowstone Veterinary Clinic…… and their record keeping is provincial.  So, I’ll be generous and grant the city (22) dog credits for the $552 spent.  


It appears Mayor Matteson, along with his predecessors and the entire animal control team, are now (410) dogs shy of a full load…… for the last 13½ years!  Now you know why Forsyth has persistent dog problems!


On Nov 22, 2010 the Forsyth City Council determined “it is necessary to amend the existing dog ordinance, 7-3-6, in order to better protect the public from nuisance animals.”  In the past (7) years, the city and sheriff’s dept have jointly issued an average of (9) dog citations per year.   So is failure due to a poor ordinance, or due to a lack of enforcement?  


Under the current city/county contract, the sheriff’s dept has zero dog responsibilities.  Additionally, the “dog catcher” position was eliminated and dog control became the purview of city shop employees……. whose motivation is highly questionable.    Yet, according to published reasoning, the city council determined the previous dog ordinance was inadequate in its ability to protect the public.  Privately, the mayor tells residents with dog problems to “grow a thick skin and turn-up the volume on your television”.   That’s a direct quote!    Add a city judge, lack of enforcement manpower and budget concerns to the list of alibis given!  Any resident knows placing a bounty on problem dogs would finance the services of a dog catcher via fines levied w/o costing the city a dime…….. so the mayor and city council must have another agenda?   Don’t expect candor or full disclosure from politicians and don’t believe everything you read.


The newly revised dog ordinance is clearly designed to further inhibit complainants!   Several classes of dogs are exempted, dogs must be multiple repeat offenders, quiet hours are eliminated, along with a few other caveats.  They’ve obviously deemed the old ordinance, and (9) citations per year, as being too liberal.    


 My residence is currently surrounded by (11) dogs and I’d be turning cartwheels if I thought the new dog ordinance was a positive step and would, as stated, “better protect the public.”  Most residents are still unaware Forsyth has become a dog sanctuary.  Say a little prayer for walkers, drive your kids to school and carry a big stick at all times!  


By the power of (69) votes for a man on a mission, Forsyth residents forfeited the sanctity of their homes to a pack of dogs!  


Ms. Boward now has a response and Forsyth residents know the unvarnished truth of the matter………..
                                              ___________________________


Dog bites wrong ass!


On or about 7/28/11, three kids were attacked, one bitten, while walking the streets of Doofusville.  How prophetic, I said it would happen…….. and it only took five months.  Well, duh!!!  Why do the innocent pay for the misdeeds of others?  


When will Doofusville voters learn to limit the number of doofuses allowed to ‘serve’ at any one time?  Vananda needs a mayor and their school needs re-carpeting, so perhaps the mayor takes his aldermen posse with him.  I fail to see how they could possibly harm Vananda!  I can’t say the mayor is in for hard times, but he won’t be able to mooch a short stack at a free pancake breakfast when I get done!  Stay tuned…..


Doofusville basement renovations:


Election Year and Job Performance in Doofusville!

Have you noticed Doofusville can’t hold a fair without the town suffering an electrical blackout?  Do you drive an ATV because Doofusville streets are so bad?  When was the last time you saw Doofusville streets swept….. or plowed on a weekend?  Have you been stuck in a Doofusville frozen rut?  Why does it take Doofusville a year to find a city judge?  Are Doofusville dogs keeping you awake at night?  Are you cleaning Doofusville dog doo-doo every time you mow the lawn?    Well, voting for incumbent clowns…….. gets more of the same!  


Did the mayor and aldermen raise their hands, swear on oath, and thereby make a promise to voters?   “……….with fidelity so help me God”.  Does a doofus know the meaning of fidelity?  

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